there yet

it is murky
though I rub at my eyes
it doesn’t help
because I am
submerged
in fact
which way is even up
did I dive down here myself
why is it so hard to move
where am I
why am I
what happened
I knew but
I didn’t know

there
there it is
sludgy muck
but enough
to touch my toes
a quick squelch
a bit of pressure
almost effortless
because there is no
there there

am I moving again
the murk remains
but yes
it’s dissipating
granules sifting away
shapes take shape
shadows ahead
that loom like
either whales
or unknown beasts
of the deep