• Alcohol and Sobriety,  The Sacred Arts

    Shake What Your Mama Gave You

    I walked confidently into that studio, though I had little idea what to expect. Sure, I’d never taken a formal dance class in my life, but everyone told me that didn’t matter, you’ll catch on easily. Plus, you’re just supposed to have fun. I knew no one there, so I was determined to let it all hang out and do just that. I’ve spent my life surrounded by dancers. My best friend since neon stretch pants were de rigueur (the first time around) took ballet everyday after school, and through the years I attended her performances and eventually befriended other dancers as well. I know what a pas de deux is and…

  • The Sacred Arts

    In Which I Am Well-Mannered for Miss Austen’s Birthday

    Yesterday was Jane Austen’s birthday. I’ll bet you thought I forgot, huh? Well, actually, I did. I’m a busy girl, and I got distracted. After all, it’s almost Christmas, and everyone’s birthday is forgotten if it falls in the few weeks before Christmas – no one knows that better than I do. I also know Miss Austen wouldn’t have been offended at my negligence, but she probably would have made a joke at my expense, and I’m fine with that. I know so many of you from my real life have always been like, “Jane Austen, so what? What’s the big deal?” and that’s fair, because that’s how I feel…

  • The Sacred Arts

    Peanuts on My Tree

    Yesterday was Charles Schulz’ birthday. I’m not sure how I missed it, since I’m pretty good about remembering famous dead people’s birthdays, but in any case I feel it’s important to mark the occasion, especially in this creative space. I mean, seeing as he and his work contribute so much to who I am and what I love about life, it’s the least I can do. It’s challenging for me to put into words my feelings about the Peanuts cartoons. They are more than a memory of simpler times in childhood’s past, more than amusing pictorial anecdotes about the pains of growing up. In fact, they are probably my favorite cartoons…

  • General Lunacy,  The Sacred Arts

    My Blog in One Sentence. Or Several.

    I have a problem. I don’t really know what I write about, and people are starting to talk. So I need a pat answer for what to say to people when they ask what my blog is about. I don’t know why it’s so hard to say “the creative process, alcoholism and the crazy shit I do,” but those phrases just refuse to pass my lips when directed to strangers, elderly relatives and coworkers who don’t know about my history of vodka bottles hidden in the closet. Someone at work asked me last week what I wrote about, and I was all, “Um, it’s hard to explain. It’s kind of…

  • The Sacred Arts

    A Halloween To-Read List, Courtesy of Your Local English Major

    Have I mentioned before that Halloween is my favorite holiday? Probably not more than once or four times… We have Halloween rituals in our family that have carried on through the years well into adulthood. Or at least what reasonably passes for adulthood in my case. Every year we bake and decorate pumpkin cookies to look like jack o’lanterns. Every year we watch a twenty year-old compilation VHS – taped from TV of course – of the Bugs Bunny Halloween special, It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, and the first ever Simpsons Halloween special.  Every year we decorate the house and carve pumpkins, too. Yes, I am twelve years old. And every…

  • Adventureland!,  Off to See the World,  The Sacred Arts

    A Post of Random Charms Captured in the Big City

    More New York stories today, yippee! I will be a travel writer yet, in spite of the many obstacles (including my inability to travel as frequently as I would like)…and in spite of Condé Nast’s total disinterest in my CV. I am not a quitter. In addition to all of the crazy stuff I documented yesterday for your viewing pleasure, we also saw a variety of historically significant/artistically brilliant/socially fabulous/only slightly touristy monuments as seen not through the lens of my warped perception, but through my other, more standard way of viewing life… See, there is a side to me (in fact, it’s probably the most significant side of me – the…

  • The Sacred Arts

    The Mighty Thesis, Part II

    Where were we? Oh yes, I was telling the story of this: I was at the economic crisis part, wasn’t I? That’s not the fun part. Sorry about that. It’s definitely the gnome’s fault. Times got tough. I lost that terrible temp job due to downsizing. I couldn’t find anyone who was hiring except my local Starbucks. By that point, I had accrued some debt from being unemployed for three months and living on credit cards and a part-time piano teaching gig. Once I became a barista/piano teacher extraordinaire, the two jobs combined BARELY covered my living expenses, but no more. So I was not exactly set up for success at this juncture…

  • The Sacred Arts

    The Mighty Thesis, Part I

    One of the most satisfying moments in my life was the day I got this in the mail. In case you couldn’t tell right away, it’s my thesis. Bound, copyrighted, PUBLISHED. For all two people who would ever want to check it out of the college library for research… Seeing my name on the binding, on the title page, made this the most fulfilling of all my exploits. To put so much effort into something you love to earn this: provides me with a sense of accomplishment beyond any I’ve yet experienced. Except for maybe that one time I ate an entire Awesome Blossom by myself and did not puke. I…

  • The Sacred Arts

    I am an Artist. Kind of. (Based on a Loose Translation of the Word)

    I am going to take a moment and be vulnerable with you guys. Ready for it? Come a little closer… … I do art. … There. It’s out there; that phrase I’ve set aside for myself, because it’s too hard for me to describe myself as an artist except in my imagination, where unicorns roam free and plaid flannel shirts will always be hip. There’s this social mindset that only pricks, posers, or “real” artists get to call themselves by that sacred nominative. And by social mindset, I mean my mindset. [Whoops, there I go, speaking on society’s behalf again. You’d have thought I’d have learned my lesson by now…] I’m not…

  • The Sacred Arts

    I Am Now an Official Bad@ss.

    I have wanted a tattoo since I was thirteen. Back then it was going to be either a gecko or unicorn, so I’m really glad my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I ever got a tattoo while under their roof. Yes, I took their threats seriously – you would too, if you knew my parents. It’s called respect, kids (see, I am a good influence in spite of myself). Anyway, I waited like the paragon of virtuous patience that I am, convinced that as soon as I had my own apartment that purple unicorn tattoo would be mine.  Ah, youth. Enter real life: bills I couldn’t keep on top…

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