Writing

Liebster Von Schleichel (Loose Translation: I Won Something!)

I’ve been nominated for an award, readers. I wasn’t sure if I was going to accept, given that I’ve already accepted another award once and I don’t want to seem like a self-important collector of accolades or worse, someone who believes in chain letter-like internet games, but darn it! Some of these questions are good and I didn’t have a blog post for today and I wanted to pimp out some new blogs and make unsuspecting bloggers feel good so WHAT THE HELL.

I’ve been nominated for an award!

The Liebster Award, to be specific.

Isn’t it fancy?

It’s an award that originated in Germany and I think it means I’m amazing or beautiful or something, but my German is a little rusty non-existent. It’s for small-ish bloggers like me with fewer than 200 readers so we can be encouraged and get small ego boosts just like professional bloggers (except pro-bloggers get paid to be awesome, whereas we’re awesome all on our own with no financial inducement. Us amateurs, just keepin’ it real).

My friend and fellow blogger Erica over at Yeah, I’m a Nerd thinks far too highly of me and nominated me for this award. She writes about ever-fresh topics such as the zombie apocalypse, how to pee standing up, and how she’s finding her voice despite a timid nature, all reasons for which I love her.  She also hosted a blog giveaway in WHICH I WON an instrument that makes it possible for me to pee standing up, for which I will be ever grateful, seeing as I love to hike and camp but hate getting a puddle of pee in my shoe because of grading or loose soil or for WHATEVER REASONS. Plus this eliminates the need to waste precious tissue wiping, which just blows my mind. BLOWS MY MIND. I’VE HAD A LOT OF CAFFEINE. GO READ HER BLOG.

So in order to accept this award, I must complete a few tasks, much like a quest or a treasure hunt.

Treasure-Hunt/Chain Letter-Like Tasks:

  1. You must thank the person who gave you this award.
  2. You must display the Liebster heart on your blog.
  3. You should nominate 3 to 5 up-and-coming blogs (with less than 200 subscribers).

Additional Chain Letter Tasks:

  • Each person must post 11 things about themselves.
  • Answer the questions the person giving the award has sent you.
  • Create 11 questions for the people you will be giving the award to.
  • Choose 11 people to award and send them the link to your post. Go to their page and tell them.

The last one is just ridiculous as well as redundant, so I’m not going to do it. In fact, pretend you didn’t even see it.

Eleven Things about The Cat Lady:

1. I can do the splits. 2. I once had hypothermia. 3. I took baking classes and once baked a cake that took twelve hours of work. 4. My favorite everything is coconut. 5. I still have a collection of video cassettes I am unwilling to part with even though a certain husband refuses to hook up the VCR. 6. I am a jewelry hoarder, and continually buy or make myself new earrings on a regular basis. 7. When prompted to write papers in college, I almost always wrote from a feminist criticism perspective. I think I’m a closeted feminist who’s not fooling anyone. 8. I like the way my cat’s breath/fur smells. 9. I once wrote a poem about Howard Hughes 10. I have Lord of the Rings collectible Barbies. Arwen and Aragon, to be specific. It was a phase. 11. I secretly like trash novels like the Twilight series and Judith McNaught romances. I know they’re total crap, but it’s my version of McDonald’s – guilty pleasures.

Questions I Must Answer or the Chain Letter Gods Will Smite Me:

  1. If you had to choose one food to eat for the rest of your life, what would it be? Easy, ice cream. And coffee. With chocolate. And french fries.
  2. In the case of a zombie apocalypse, if one of the people most dear to you turned into a zombie, would you put them out of their misery, lock them up in hopes for a cure, or set them free to feed on brains? (Or if you have another alternative, what would you do?) I’d take him out. Seriously, it’s for his own good. I once had a dream that I had to do that to my little sister, so I think I’ve made the right decision.
  3. When living with a spouse or partner, what are your thoughts about using the restroom with the door open? My thoughts used to be all, “Hey, this is intimacy, deal with me on the pot!” Then I got married and realized it’s impossible to maintain any level of mystique with that sort of attitude, so it’s closed-door. Even though I feel like it’s a natural part of being human, I like mystique more. 
  4. Why did you start your blog? Because after college I had no outlet for my writing, and it built and built until I got depressed. That’s when I realized I wanted to write for a living. Because I like to suffer.
  5. Who is your favorite super hero? I’m not much on super heroes, but Batman because Christian Bale. Plus, Batman’s kind of dark. Dark is cool.
  6. If you could be any animal in the world, what animal would you be and why? My cat. She sleeps whenever, cavorts whenever, eats whenever, and we worship her. I want to be her. I’m working on an invention that would allow for that.
  7. What are your feelings on Hot Cheetos and Takis? Hot Cheetos are necessary every once in a while, like when they’re available and you’re hungry. Takis are what, now?
  8. Toilet paper hanging over or under? Do not care in the slightest, just put the damn roll on. Not doing so is the laziest act of which a human is capable.
  9. Do you believe in ghosts?  Why or why not? Yes and no. I’ve never seen one, I have no reason to believe they exist, but it would be so fun if they did! Most of the stories I made up as a kid involve ghosts. Or bad cops.
  10. If you could leave today and go anywhere in the world for a week-long trip, where would you go? (money and life won’t get in your way, so dream as big as you’d like). Italy. I have never been, and that’s next on my life-list. I NEED to see a Brunelleschi in real life or I will DIE.
  11. Mac or PC and why? Both. I know PCs in and out, so they’re easier for me because I’m lazy, but Macs are SO COOL, plus PHOTOSHOP!!

Cat Lady’s Questions:

  1. Did you ever have a teacher who yelled at/embarrassed/totally ruined you for life? If so, tell the story.
  2. What is your dream career?
  3. Unicorn or Sasquatch for president?
  4. What is your most embarrassing habit?
  5. If you could have one talent that you do not currently have, what would it be?
  6. Last meal on earth: describe in detail. I’m hungry.
  7. If you could only bring three things on a deserted island, what would they be?
  8. Favorite guilty pleasure?
  9. What kind of car do you drive, and what do you think that says about you?
  10. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
  11. Favorite Disney movie?

Cat Lady’s Nominees:

Wino On A Ramble – Of course I like her blog! If I weren’t an alcoholic, I’d want to live her life (she’s a wine manager). She’s hilarious, she travels, and she writes about her cats. We also share a love of coconut butter. WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE HERE?

The Whimsical Crafter – Not only does she make and sell gorgeous jewelry and other crafts made of felted wool beads (they’re beautiful, so go look at them!), she is FUNNY and WITTY. We also both share a short attention span and wow I think I’m going to finish this pumpkin ice cream by myself…

(I stole that from you, Stacie. I hope you don’t mind, as I did it in service of pimping your blog.)

Caustic Snark – I like the way he writes about banned books and cats and Ents. I mean, what else is there in life? Plus, as promised, there is snark, and goodness knows I thrive on snark.

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